I feel like we, as a culture, make relationships too hard. Especially romantic relationships. We are always seeking out that grand gesture or over-the-top moment when our significant other takes our breath away or sweeps us off of our feet. The reality is, though, that those moments are few and far between if they ever even occur. So instead of seeking out those moments, why not appreciate the little moments in a relationship where our partner does something kind or generous to show us that they care? Take for instance this morning. Over the weekend I had begun to feel under the weather. My head was congested and I had sneezed about 400 times. I couldn’t breathe through either nostril and you know how miserable that is. We had a myriad of drugs for one thing or the next in the medicine cabinet and I had tried and failed to doctor my symptoms with various over the counter medicines. I know my body, though, and I knew that it needed Alka Seltzer Cold & Flu. Whatever is wrong with me, that stuff generally knocks it out in no time flat (even though it tastes absolutely disgusting). So this morning, before beginning his own hectic day, my husband left early and went out to get his coffee in his normal routine. When he returned, however, what do you think he had? That’s right…Alka Seltzer Cold & Flu. It was such a sweet gesture and it made me stop and appreciate him and the fact that he cared enough to make an extra stop along his normal journey to pick up something to make me feel better. It’s these sort of little things that really make a relationship good. And it seems so simple. Oh your husband brought you medicine when you were sick big whoop. But the point is, he didn’t have to. I didn’t ask him to. He just wanted me to feel better so he did. Of his own volition. It was the nicest thing that anyone could have done for me in that moment and it brought a smile to my face and warmed my heart, if only for a few seconds.
I’ll give you another example. This is for those of you who aren’t romantically involved with someone. A few days ago my coworker came into work just like she normally does, but this day she began to dig something out of her bag. One at a time she pulled 5 biscuits out of that bag. She had brought breakfast for the whole office. Now nothing was special about this day. She just thought of us and wanted to provide breakfast for us out of the goodness of her heart. It was a small and simple little gesture that really made the whole day brighter for all parties involved.
So the next time find yourself looking for the grand hoo hah of gestures from someone that you are in a relationship with, or someone who you work with or deal with on a regular basis, I challenge you to look for smaller, simpler things that that person has done for you. You might begin to see that they have really been trying to make you happy one small gesture at a time. And you might even be more apt to extend tiny gestures of kindness to those around you, as well.